Scheduled

It was sort of surreal when I got the letter in the mail. It was from my OB/GYN's nurse and it said that my baby would be delivered at 9am on Thursday, December 4th.

Below this sterile news was a list of preparations for me to fulfill prior to arriving at the hospital, 2 hours, before my surgery.

I called my husband and let him know the news. He agreed that it was so bizarre that a letter told us when our second child would be arriving, not the baby or my body. A medical decision had been made and that was that.

At first I was sort of bummed out because there was no longer that element of excitement or surprise; I could no longer wonder when my baby was going to be born. I already knew and could mark it on my calendar like any other task, chore or event, which was odd in and of itself since I am a planner by nature and you would think that I would love the knowing aspect of this like anything else.

I guess I felt sort of gypped, like my daughter had no say in the matter-she couldn't break my water and tell me when she was good and ready to arrive. She didn't know it yet, but her birthday had already been pre-selected. Isn't bearing children supposed to be natural and on mother nature's time clock, not a hospital's schedule?

After a few days of letting my daughter's pre-determined birthdate sink in, I realized that it would be alright for things to be different the second time around because it was what the doctors thought was best for the baby and best for me. I began to like how easy it was going to be to plan for childcare and my husband's schedule and carpooling to pre-school and all those other things that can get mucked up when you unexpectedly go into labor.

I decided that just because there was no element of surprise to her birth that did not mean that her birth would be any less wonderful and empowering than my son's.

TGIF

I just recently learned the other day that BuyBuyBaby accepts Bed Bath & Beyond gift certificates and coupons! How great is that? It makes sense if you think about it because the stores look alike on the inside and are laid out in a very similar way. A friend of mine was kind enough to share this information with me and I want to pay it forward to all of you.

Another great thing to keep in mind is that even though Bed Bath & Beyond coupons have expiration dates on them, the stores will still accept an expired coupon of theirs and honor you with the discount.

I hope you find this Tips and Good Information Friday tidbit helpful for you the next time you head out to shop for something for the kiddies or your home.

Recommendation Wednesdays

For today's recommendation I want to highlight Kinder Haus Toys in Arlington, Virginia.

This place is definitely my favorite toy store around. They carry clothes, shoes, accessories, books, toys and some large furniture items like Nilo play tables and train tables.

There are four reasons that I like to spend my money at this toy store as opposed to any other. 1) It is huge and has a wonderful variety of toys. In addition to carrying all the name brand toys that you see most places, KHT offers some newer lines of toys and some less well known lines from Europe. I have never gone to this store and not found something new and fresh, which I think is great. 2) Everyone that works there is knowledgeable and friendly. Each staff member knows exactly where each toy goes and they make some really nice recommendations for presents and gifts if needed. They are also good at suggesting age appropriate play items for your playroom and they are never pushy or overwhelming. 3) Although this store is large and there is a lot of different stuff in there, it is laid out very logically and it is easy to browse. You can flow from one section to the next without feeling overwhelmed by the selection. Things are placed together by category and it is easy to decipher age related toys and gender related toys. 4) KHT also offers a nice play area for the little ones. They have a large train table, stocked with many trains, not just one or two, and they also have a Nilo table set up with blocks and other small hand toys to entertain your little ones.

This is a real gem of a toy store and definitely worth checking out sometime. They also offer a story time each Monday and Friday at 10:30am. The story time area is on the smaller side and slightly cramped, but there is the play area for the kids to explore as well and not many people know about this story time so it has not been over run with people, yet. At the end of the story time, each child is given a balloon to take home which is always a nice take away for the ride home.

For your next birthday party shopping excursion, I encourage you to branch out and check out this wonderful toy store in the heart of Arlington.

Different Babies, Different Pregnancies

At a little over 7 months, I am now really beginning to understand what "they" (doctors, specialists, medical professionals, your parents, and other moms etc.) mean when they say that all pregnancies are different.

In the first 3-4 months of my second pregnancy all my symptoms were the same as with my first pregnancy-horrible morning sickness, acne along my jawline and cheekbones, and extreme fatigue. Once my belly started to show-this happened a lot faster the second time around-it appeared to everyone that knew me, that I was carrying the same way as I did with my first pregnancy, further convincing people that I was having another boy.

Imagine how shocked my husband and I were to learn at our five month ultrasound that we would in fact be having a baby girl this time around-ROLL OUT THE PINK. From the outside I looked the same as I did with my first pregnancy, was carrying the same way as with my first pregnancy, but it was what was going on inside me this time around that was so different.

Maybe it is because I am under a lot of stress (work, health issues with family members, husband who is growing a business and working insane hours etc.) as of late, but in the last couple of months I have noticed a real shift in my pregnancy and a a change in myself-one that I do not necessarily like. I have been extremely emotional and hormonal all the time. I get easily annoyed by things that never used to bother me and I have a real sense of dread sometimes about not getting everything done before the baby's arrival.

It is obvious that this pregnancy is different than my first one and it is clear that I need to deal with these issues in a different way than I have been so that I do not make myself overly stressed out before our little girl gets here. I cannot take feeling this way any longer so I am going to try to make some changes to feel better on the inside so that I am as healthy inside as I am on the outside.

I am making it my goal this week to get back on track with things and to get away from this feeling of malaise that has set in. Sometimes breaking the cycle and getting out of a rut can be one of the hardest things to do, but also one of the most liberating things too.

What is my plan? It's pretty simple and still in the "construction phase," but here it is: 1) Get more sleep, which translates as: get into bed no later than 10pm each night. Waiting until I fall asleep on the sofa and then migrating to my bedroom is doing horrible things to my sleep cycle. More rest should help with my fatigue and irritability. 2) Hire a babysitter to help me out 10 hours a week or so. I need to get a lot of work done before I have the baby and I have gotten to the point where it is time to call in reinforcements and ask for help. I must remember to reassure myself that I am NOT a total loser for needing a little help with my toddler from time- to- time. Balancing work life and home life can be hard and it is even harder to try and do by yourself, so why make myself crazy in the process? 3) Make myself a priority. I have been neglecting my own needs for too long. I need to get more rest and slow down. If the dishes sit in the sink overnight every once in a while, I need to accept the fact that the world will NOT end and that the household police will not fail me on the kitchen inspection portion of the "test."

If any of you out there are currently pregnant and feeling a little overwhelmed or out of sorts, I encourage you to search for some answers. Figure out where your problem(s) lie and try to think of at least one or two small steps that you can take to alleviate them. I did it and I feel better already even though I just started implementing my 3-step plan. Sometimes, just talking about what you need to change with your partner or writing it down and reading it to yourself can be helpful as well. Remember, if you are not taking care of yourself, it is hard to care for your spouse and your family.

TGIF

For this Friday's Tips and Good Information (TGIF) I am going to share two tidbits of information with you.

The first one is about avocados. Bruno loves avocados but rarely eats a whole one in a sitting. If you cut the avocado in half and feed your child the half without the pit, you can leave the pit in the other half and preserve it in the refrigerator for longer. By leaving the pit in the uneaten portion of the avocado, you keep it from turning brown and getting mushy. This is a great way to prolong the life of your produce.

The other tip is about one of my favorite websites, www.diapers.com. I have recommended this website before and I will continue to do so. Currently they are offering an incentive for new customers. If you spend $49 or more and enter this code: DABU3069, you will receive $10 off of your order and I will get a $1 credit towards my next purchase. Talk about spreading the good word about a great website and receiving something great in the process. The more friends you share this information with the more people there are out there saving money!

Spread the word, share the savings, and pay it forward!

Recommendation Wednesdays

When I was at at the park this past Monday chatting with one of my favorite mommy friends, the conversation turned to the vent/commiserate/rant phase that is common after mothers are completely wiped out from the series of summer activities and are forced to deal with extra cantankerous kiddies as the fall starts and schedules change.

Anyways, it was clear that my friend was burnt out. The summer was long and hot and involved lots of traveling and health issues for one of her little ones. Since it was the start of a new school year she made two goals for herself: to hire a new cleaning woman and to get a new babysitter (her other one had returned to school). I told her that I thought those were realistic reasonable goals and that more mothers should have sensible goals like that. She went on to say that it had become apparent to her that she was not taking good care of herself and that that in turn was putting a strain on everything else-her communication lines with her husband, her long days with the kids, her patience and emotional well-being etc.

As I sat there and spoke with her about how I could totally relate (I always try to do too much and often play the role of the Mommy Martyr instead of asking for help for fear that I will be judged as a failure by everyone for not being able to work, have a family and do seven million other things simultaneously) I realized that I too was not taking care of myself either. I believe my exact words were something to the effect of: "it's just too easy to put your husband's needs and your children's needs and the demands of your household before yourself. When you get married it is one thing, but once you are a mommy, you always come last."

Now that I reread these words, it is sad to think that mommies are the glue that run the house and hold the family together, yet mommies are always in last place when it comes to getting their own needs met.

This casual chat at the park reminded me of the best advice my mother has ever given me and I want to share it with all of you, since it so simple to do. My mother always said to "Do Something Nice For Yourself Everyday." When I was younger I thought this meant something really extreme, like save your allowance and buy yourself a pony, but as I have gotten older and the stressors in my life have grown exponentially, I have come to understand that this something nice that you do for yourself everyday should be something small. Something that reminds you for a minute that there are simple gifts in this world, that you are appreciated, and that you have the hardest job in the world.

These nice things do not necessarily have to be time consuming either, because nice means something different for every person and nice can vary from day to day. It could be as small as treating yourself to a Starbucks coffee instead of coffee at home. It could involve reading a book for pleasure for 10 minutes while waiting in the carpool line or it could mean telling your husband that he is in charge of ordering food for dinner (you just can't bear the thought of cooking tonight) or cleaning up the dishes.

For my recommendation this Wednesday, I am offering a reminder to all you overworked, underpaid, overtired, stressed out SAHMs-"Do Something Nice For Yourself Everyday." You will be surprised how the littlest things can make a huge difference in your demeanor.

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

I was at Turtle park earlier today with my son and I was so impressed by this short encounter that I had with an 8 year-old boy, Adam, that I have to share it.

Bruno and I were in the corner of the park by the hill with no grass, only dirt, and my son had gleefully decided that he was going to haul a Tonka truck up to the top of the hill and push it down-repeatedly. As much as Bruno was enjoying this game, he tired after about three turns and decided that he wanted to keep playing this game so he would push the truck down the hill and Mommy would fetch it while he stood at the top and watched. Of course I obliged because that's what Mommies do, but after a while I too began to tire of this game. It was unusually hot today and being 7 months pregnant makes you pretty sweaty to begin with, so marching up and down a dirty hill in the heat was not my first choice of park activities, but how could I say no to my boy?

After about my tenth trip up the dirt hill, a chatty little boy, Adam, came over to join in the fun. Adam was about 8 or 9 years old and he had chosen a nice round cement mixer to send down the hill of dirt. Adam must have seen me sigh or maybe he sensed my fatigue as I struggled up the hill yet again with Bruno's Tonka in tow, because he looked at me and said: "Mommies always have to do the most work."

I was caught so off guard by this child's poignant remark that I almost didn't answer him. "Well, I said, he (pointing to Bruno) is still so little so it's kinda hard for him to climb up the hill with the truck on his own."

Adam seemed perfectly happy with this response and went back to pushing his cement mixer down the hill as planned. Once I got to the top of the hill, Bruno threw his arms open and happily accepted the Tonka truck. Bruno turned it around and got it set up the way he wanted and before long it was sailing down the hill at top speed once again. Adam was already half way down the hill to retrieve his cement mixer by the time Bruno's Tonka came roaring onto the scene and without a word or a glance in my direction, Adam picked up his cement mixer and Bruno's Tonka and walked to the top of the hill. When he reached the top he laid the Tonka at Bruno's feet and began busily setting up his mixer for another run.

For the next twenty minutes or so Adam and Bruno played alongside each other, years apart in age, but both happy as clams with their new found hill of entertainment. Each time Adam sent his truck down, he would wait for Bruno's to arrive at the foot of the hill and he would walk the Tonka up the hill and lay it at Bruno's feet. Each time Bruno would happily clap his hands and dance around, so excited that his truck was being returned to his eager little hands.

There was something so nice and good about this child and his helpful gesture that I was amazed at his age-he couldn't have been more than 9. I feel like he really hit the nail on the head when he told me that Mommies always have to do the most work and even though he probably didn't realize how insightful his comment was at the time, it made me feel appreciated and like I was good mommy for going the extra mile at the park in the heat with my little boy.

They say that actions speak louder than words and today I experienced that. By bringing Bruno's truck up the hill along with his own, it was as if Adam was saying to me: "Hey, I realize you are tired and hot and pregnant, so let me help you out a little."

When we left the park a little while later I couldn't help but hope that one day my own little boy grows up and learns to let his own benevolent actions speak louder than his words.

TGIF

Do you ever feel like your pantry or hall closet is being overrun by left over plastic bags from the grocery store? If you are like me, you use your extra bags for doggie waste and dirty diapers, but not everyone knows this trick. Check it out and see what you think.

When you are in the kitchen at night preparing dinner, place one or two empty Safeway or Harris Teeter plastic bags on your counter and use them for waste as you are cooking.

I usually reserve one bag for the packaging and waste (trimmed fat etc.) from the meat that I am preparing for dinner. This way you are not dripping chicken juice (with bacteria, E-coli etc.) all over your counter, floor and garbage can; you are containing everything in one plastic bag that you can tie up and place directly into your trash pail. This also protects little hands and doggie tongues from licking up or touching these harmful bacteria if they get into the kitchen trash can, which they sometimes do!

I use the second bag for vegetable refuse as I am peeling, coring, seeding etc. I find that having the open bag right in front of me on the counter helps cut down on the number of trips I make to the garbage can and it is so convenient it helps me maintain a "clean as I cook" mentality in my kitchen which makes cleaning up after dinner a lot quicker too.

If you have never tried this trick, please give it a whirl the next time you are cooking, I think you will find it is a great time saver and that it helps keep things really clean.

Recommendation Wednesdays

I have been a huge fan of the diapers.com website for almost a year now. When my son was an infant and we moved into our house, I finally had the ability to store large quantities of products like paper towels, bottled waters, and diapers so I began ordering from diapers.com in bulk.

My sister-in-law recommended the site to me originally and the first time I used it, I became hooked. It was so easy so use and the site is laid out so well that it makes it very efficient to find exactly what you are looking for. Another thing that I really liked was that when I went out to do my errands, I didn't have to buy diapers in bulk at the grocery store or at Target where they not only cost more, but took up so much space in the shopping cart and then in the back of my car, that it made it cumbersome.

When you place an order from diapers.com, your items gets shipped to your front door step within 24-48 hours-how much easier can things get? If you spend over $50 (which is not hard when buying packages of 200 diapers at a time) shipping is FREE!

Diapers.com has excellent customer service representatives who are knowledgeable about products and the one time they left an item out of my order, they shipped it to my house for free within 24 hours. You even get little samples of products thrown in with your orders so that you can try out new items.

Originally I only used this site for diapers and formula, but now they have expanded their repertoire of items and they carry children's clothing, toys, medicines, feeding supplies, and breast feeding supplies.

Once you go in and create an account, which takes about 3 minutes, your information is kept on file, which cuts down on the amount of time that it takes to place your orders in the future.

I have found their selection to be excellent (they carry all the name brands, plus many of the organic ones, and even the discount brands like Kirkland) and their prices can't be beat, plus the convenience of ordering from them online is a real time saver for busy moms.

Now I go to the diapers.com site about once a month and order all the supplies I need for my son-diapers, wipes, Motrin, sippy cups, disposable bibs, bath products and more!

Anything that saves me time on the mommy front makes me a happy mommy!

TGIF

If you want to prolong the shelf life of your berries-blueberries, blackberries, strawberries or raspberries-try this great trick.

When you purchase a new container of berries, dump the contents out into a bowl. Line the bottom of the berry container with a dry, clean paper towel and place the berries back into the container on top of the paper towel. Store the berries in the refrigerator and remove portions as needed and then clean them. If one berry spoils, remove that one from the carton and throw it away so that it does not rot the other berries in the container.

By storing berries in their own container with a paper towel in the refrigerator, you increase their shelf life by a week.

Berries are some of my son's favorite food and they are so expensive that it is a shame when they spoil after a couple of days. I tried this trick with a container of strawberries and now I do it religiously for all my berries since it works so well.

Pass it on and tell your friends.

Recommendation Wednesdays

Now that the summer is officially over and schedules are changing, here is a recommendation for a great family friendly restaurant in Arlington. If you are looking for something to do with your little ones, try the Chestnut Hills Park right up the street and then head on over to Pie-tanza for a little lunch afterwards, you will not be disappointed with either place.

I love this restaurant! Nestled in the shopping center on the corner of N. Harrison Street and Lee Highway, this casual pizzeria has it all-great food, a large menu with a huge selection, cheap prices, ample parking, kid-friendly environment, take out options, and friendly staff. You can dine-in or carry out, which is a nice option for the colder months and they even offer catering options as well.


As an added bonus, it is located above a toy store called Aladdin's Lamp that frequently has toddler story time, craft activities, or featured local authors one to two days a week.

I eat at this restaurant at least once a week with other moms and their kids. When I am done I sometimes stop by the grocery store which is only 3 doors down in the same shopping center or I will go inside and downstairs to the toy store, Aladdin's Lamp, to pick up birthday gifts or to browse the book section with my own son.

School Days

As I walked through the mall today with my 16 month-old, Bruno, in the stroller, I looked around at all the kids getting ready to start school-haircuts, new shoes, new backpacks etc.- and I couldn't help but remember what the first day back to school was like. I used to call all my friends the day before to hear about their summers and to plan what outfit would be the best thing to wear that first day.

There was always a mixed sense of excitement coupled with fear and anxiety about the first day of school. Would my teacher be nice? Would I be prepared to learn everything that I was supposed to? Would my friends still like me?

It's been so long since my own first day of any school ( first day of kindergarten, middle school, high school, college) that I almost forgot all the preparation and excitement that accompany it. There is something so calming about the back to school rituals that always took two or three days to complete-haircuts and shoes one day, school supplies and backpacks another day. As my own thoughts were consumed by my old memories of my own first school days, I realized that my 16 month-old was too young to even know that he would be going to his first day of Pre-K in one week. He did not yet understand what these rituals signaled.The excitement of preparing to go to school were still unknown to him. It was at this moment that I got choked up for the first time about my son going to school-where had the time gone? Was he too young? Was I making the right decision to send him early?

I think that I was mostly sad that I wouldn't get to spend as much time with him as I usually do, but I was also sad that he had grown so fast and I worried that he wouldn't be ready for Pre-K and that his lack of preparation would be a direct reflection of my skills as a parent.

By the end of our trip to the shoe store and the haircut place, I came to terms with the fact that even if I wasn't ready for Bruno to go to his first day of school, that didn't mean that Bruno wasn't ready to go to his first day of school. Yes I would miss him while he was at school and I would worry and wonder about what he was doing each moment of each day, but at the same time, I remembered how happy it made me each year to go through these back to school rituals of haircuts and shoe buying because it meant that the dull days of summer were over and I was allowed to return to a fun place where I flourished.

So as I purchased new shoes and asked the lady to not cut too high on the sides above my son's ears, I felt good about my decision to send my son to Pre-K early, hopeful that he too will remember the rituals of returning to school and smile.....one day.